It can be very exhausting when you can’t stop thinking about someone, having the person stuck in your mind, especially when you’d rather focus on other important things. After all, if you can’t stop thinking about him, it can be hard to forget him. It will also be difficult to keep your head in the game.
Don’t be too surprised if you find it hard to focus and participate in the present moment. All these are more reasons for you to look for a solution to that thought that distracts you. Don’t worry: you are in the right place.
There are many reasons why you have not been able to forget and stop thinking about him, and some of them will be detailed below; you can’t find a solution to a problem you don’t even know the cause of.
To stop thinking about someone, you must first figure out why you keep thinking about that person.
Why don’t you stop thinking about someone
1. You are probably in love with him
First of all, it could be love! This isn’t always the case, but for most people, when they’re in love, they couldn’t go a minute without thinking about their love interest.
Maybe, he understands you and makes you feel like his world when he is with you. You realize that you like him beyond the average, and it seems that he likes you too.
It’s normal to keep thinking about him and fantasizing about what a relationship with him will be like.
It can be even more difficult if your feeling is not reciprocated. Either way, being in love sends your hormones and brain chemistry into overdrive.
Dopamine, a chemical released in the body when you touch or think about this guy, becomes responsible for the giddy feeling you can’t seem to get over.
2. You are probably in love
I’m not arguing that you can be in love with him, but you also have to be rational. The recurring thoughts of him in your mind could just be the result of your crush on him.
You are probably deeply interested in this guy and curious about his life, his likes and dislikes.
You could even be dreaming about him when you sleep. Somewhere in your mind, you know that a relationship with him is a pipe dream, but you can’t help but feel attracted and interested in him.
3. They give mixed signals
Everyone has been in this confused state once or twice in their life. It’s giving you signs you can’t figure out, and it’s frustrating. he likes you or he doesn’t like you
He is hot and cold; it seems like he likes you one minute and the next; you are left wondering if you imagined his affection. Because of this, you can’t help but think about him and how he feels about you.
4. You are a dreamer
The poor guy probably hasn’t shared a few words with you, but you’ve already built a future with him. That’s fine. We all need a bit of fantasy in our lives to distract us from the present from time to time.
What is alarming is when you bring your fantasy into your reality and you can’t think of a life without it.
The reason you can’t stop thinking about him might not be his fault in any way.
You are probably bored or trying to avoid the harsh reality of your life, and you think that if you can get him into your life, things would be better with him.
If you just can’t seem to work it out and start trying to include it in all of your activities, then it’s a good thing you’re reading this!
5. You have a relationship with him and you don’t know where he is going
It can be exhausting when you can’t seem to figure out where your relationship with someone is headed. This is called relationship anxiety, and it’s normal to have when you can’t work out your relationship.
Your genuine concern could be the reason you can’t get his thoughts out of your head. You wonder if he really has feelings for you or is just going with the flow.
You know you like him and want the relationship to blossom into something better, but all you can tell from his action is indifference to where your relationship is.
It’s normal to have relationship anxiety when you want your relationship to grow, but when it starts to interrupt your daily life, you may need to sit down with this guy and tell him how you feel.
6. He is not attracted to you
Most people obsess over what they can’t have. You know that he is not interested in you or that he is already in a serious relationship, he may even have made it clear why he cannot be with you, but this only makes you want him more.
You feel challenged, and your big brain is now spitting out different shapes and things you can do to get their attention.
These thoughts are probably why you can’t stop thinking about him.
7. He broke up with you
Dealing with heartbreak can be difficult, but you must understand that the end of a relationship is not the end of the world.
But you don’t want the relationship to end, and somehow in your head you’ve convinced yourself that he’ll come back when he misses you or come back when he realizes his mistake.
You just don’t understand how he can move on when he said you were his oxygen while you’re still together.
When the last person you expect to hurt you really does hurt you, you may want a rational explanation for why they did it. When he can’t get anything from the other party, he starts thinking of different excuses, and most of them are usually about ways he must have pushed him away with something he did.
These thoughts can easily get out of control, which is why you need to figure out how to stop thinking about him and forget about him. It won’t be easy, but it is possible.
Now that you’ve probably figured out why you can’t stop thinking about this guy, let’s dive into how to forget and stop thinking about him.
Read: Relationship Help: Answers to Questions People Ask
How to forget and stop thinking about someone
1. Cut contact
Stopping communicating with someone important to you in a certain way can be difficult. But, if you need to stop thinking and forget about him, this is a crucial step.
Stop calling and texting and, if possible, avoid seeing him entirely for the time it will take for you to get over your thoughts about him. Hears! That includes their profiles on social networks. Don’t take a look.
If you can’t help but see him because he’s your colleague, neighbor, or classmate, you can be friendly without going overboard with jokes.
Be courteous, but do not engage in small talk or jokes. If he asks why you switched to him, explain that you just need time to work out some personal issues.
2. Redirect your thoughts
Redirecting your thoughts the instant you find yourself thinking about him is a way to rewire your brain and give it new signals.
It will take time to stop thinking about him eventually, and instead of beating yourself up for your battle with the distracting thought, just stick to this redirection routine.
Try out different thoughts and go with the one that can grab your attention better than your thoughts in your head.
3. Throw away things that remind you of him
Holding on to things that remind you of him is not a good idea. Out of sight is usually out of mind at times. Get rid of those things or hide them in the farthest corner of your closet. A place you don’t visit often.
A co-author on wikiHow he suggests asking a friend to hold on to those things while you get through it. That way, you won’t be tempted to reach for those things when their thoughts pop into your mind.
4. Go on vacation
Get out of town for a few days if you can. Vacations are known to help people rejuvenate. It might just be the right distraction you need.
Do not visit places that remind you of him. Visit a new place that you probably haven’t been before or a place with a different kind of feeling towards you. See old friends or loved ones you haven’t seen in a long time.
An effective way to keep their thoughts from floating around in your head is if you create new memorable experiences.
5. Learn something new
Learn a new hobby or take a free pro course just for the heck of it. Try arts and crafts, hitchhiking, knitting, or even a yoga class.
Cooking class or poetry class is also something that can occupy your attention. You wouldn’t want to burn down the house just because your thoughts wandered now, would you?
6. Try to forgive him
It may be surprising, but you’re probably thinking about him because you feel slighted by something that really hurt you. A breakup is a good example.
If you can’t stop thinking about your ex or why he did what he did, it may be time to forgive him and move on with your life.
Yes, it can be hard to get over anger and hurt; however, if you forgive him, it might be easier to stop thinking about him and even forget him in the long run.
7. Solve the other problems in your life
Another way to get rid of thoughts about someone is to take an introspective look at their life. Find out what problems you are using to avoid their thoughts. You should check the aspect of your life that you are not satisfied with and try to find a solution that works.
Stop using it as a distraction because, at the end of the day, problems don’t go anywhere on their own.
No one expects you to turn your emotions on and off on a whim, but you’re only doing yourself a huge disservice if you don’t try to get better control of your thoughts.
Photo by Kevin Turcios on Unsplash